My story is a series of blessings beginning in 1984 when I accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. It was Easter Sunday, I was ten years old. It was the greatest decision I have ever made to put my faith in Jesus. I was a rotten kid and made some bad choices in high school but God loved me anyway and restored me and blessed me in spite of all my sin. I really got serious about serving the Lord in college. I surrendered to ministry and began serving faithfully in church work, leading youth and children’s ministries.
At 29, when I was content to serve Christ alone and be single, that was when I met Shane. We had a six-month courtship and we were married in 2002. We honeymooned in Branson for three days before we began our service on staff at East Boulder Baptist Church in Colorado.
We had been married about two weeks, when I got my first taste of what life would be like living with a mountain man from Wyoming. Shane took me to my first Mountain Man Rendezvous in Jackson, Wyoming. I was indoctrinated very early on about the importance of being a true to the period, totally authentic and a real purist. We camped in the primitive style of the 1830’s and 1840’s and we did things by the book. Shane had conducted a significant amount of research on the Mountain Man era, trade goods, music, clothing, food, traps and buck skinning gear. His authenticity, genuineness and sincerity characterized his entire life, going way beyond the scope of historical reenactments.
Shane did everything by the book, and by that, I mean the Word of God. He was a student of the Bible and loved to study and teach God’s Word. His desire for people to know Christ transcended everything he did. Whether he was repelling, hiking, hunting, camping or preaching, teaching, singing, or playing one of a slew of instruments, Shane was always investing the lives of other people. He made the most of every opportunity he had to share the love of Christ. He did it deliberately, with urgency, diligence and discipline. I think he understood that life is short, life is precious, and life is totally unpredictable.
In 2003, we were blessed with the arrival of our first child, David Caleb. Our son was born 15 weeks premature. His lungs were not ready for this world and he was taken home to glory 15 days after he was born. Caleb was such a blessing to us; he was a miracle baby. I was told that I could not have children because of a condition called polycystic ovarian syndrome, but God blessed us with a little boy.
Shane was at a Pastor’s conference in Wyoming and I was at a Women’s Retreat in Colorado when we got the news that our little boy had given up the fight and gone home to be with Jesus. The grieving process began for us separately, as Shane drove the five hours home and I wept in the hospital, holding my lifeless son in my arms. Shane preached Caleb’s funeral; he said it was the hardest thing he had ever done. He used a familiar passage of comfort, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.” This verse still comforts me today, as I try to imagine my husband telling me even know, “To Trust.”
In 2004, Shane received his second Master’s degree, this one in Divinity from Golden Gate Seminary. It was another blessing. Shane was a life-long learner and pursued education with passion. He had planned to go on and receive a doctorate in Organizational Change to use in churches and denominational work. Meanwhile, I went on a diet. I lost my pregnancy weight, which was also a real blessing. At that time, we had been living in a one-bedroom, 400 square foot apartment to save money and in November, we bought a new house. And God’s hand of blessing was evident once again.
In September of 2005, Elizabeth Grace Ewen arrived. We called her Ellie. I was on full bed rest with Ellie because of my complications with Caleb. She came five weeks earlier than expected but she was completely healthy, weighing in at 5 lbs. 2 ounces. The most beautiful sound in the world was her cry; I never got to hear her brother cry. Just one week after her emergency delivery, we went home, together. She was a delightful baby and loved to be held all of the time. She was a cuddler, with bright eyes like her Mama and a crooked little smile like her Daddy. She was a real-attention getter at churches that we visited in Colorado, Texas, Arkansas and Wyoming. She loved listening to cowboy poetry, bluegrass and gospel music and she loved listening to Shane’s voice when he preached. I often had to carry her to the nursery during worship services because she would ‘get to preachin’ and competing with her Daddy.
Ellie always looked like she knew a secret; she could look you in the eyes and melt your heart. What a tremendous blessing she was! We were called to serve the Wyoming Southern Baptist Convention not long after Ellie was born. Working for the WSBC and doing denominational work was Shane’s dream job. He had worked for this opportunity his entire life and believed that job was a direct answer to prayer. He attributed it to the promise, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” The job opportunity and move to Wyoming were part of a grander plan that I still don’t understand to this day. But we recognized what was happening in our lives and in our ministry as blessings from above. His role as Church Health Strategist allowed him to work very closely with Pastors and leaders in the State. He was passionate about encouraging Pastors, training lay leaders and helping churches grow by helping with outreach programs like Vacation Bible School, music ministry, and educational and recreational ministries. He thought of himself as a modern-day circuit-riding preacher. This job allowed him to travel across his home state of Wyoming and invest in the lives of people, building churches and building-up church leaders.
Ellie and I joined Shane in Wyoming in March. He had been serving Wyoming churches since October, while I was fulfilling my commitment at the Law Firm where I worked in Denver. On March 17th, I left my job to be a full time wife, and support Shane in ministry and be a full time mother. Just nine days after Ellie and I arrived in Wyoming, Shane and Ellie were called heavenward.
Many of you know of the tragic events of Sunday, March 26, 2006. That Sunday, my husband preached a sermon on the prodigal son in a small church in Lander, Wyoming. That afternoon, while we were enroute to Big Piney, a few hours away, to lead Sunday evening services at another small country church, we were caught in a snowstorm with limited visibility on South Pass. A truck crossed over into our lane and hit our car head on. Shane and Ellie were killed as a result of the injuries caused by the crushing force of that truck. Ellie died instantly in the crash. Shane died the following day from an injury he sustained to his heart. But Shane’s ministry is not dead. Shane’s ministry lives on! The impact that he had on people continues to thrive today. I wish he could be here to see it!
The damage to my body was so extensive that I was not expected to live. I have traditionally refrained from going into detail about the severity of my injuries, but because of my supernatural recovery, I am obligated to tell you about how badly my torso and limbs were crushed so that you may also believe in God’s healing power, evidenced through modern-day miracles. One year ago, the numbers C1, T1, and L4 sounded like BINGO call combinations, but now I am uniquely familiar with the broken bones and fractures that rippled through my spine. I also cracked my pelvic bone, crushed the femur, and broke the radius, ulna, and 5th metacarpal (pinky-finger) on my left side. I had severe blunt force trauma to the head and broken ribs, one ripping loose and puncturing my left lung. I also sustained a deep gash in my right leg where the mangled metal pinned me to the backseat of the car. I had glass wedged in my upper lip and my tongue was mutilated from the vice grip I created with my own teeth. Today, after extensive rehab, I am walking and more physically fit than I was prior to the crash.
You may be asking yourself, as I did, what is the purpose of this? Why would God allow such senseless, tragic deaths? I haven’t figured that out yet, I am still searching for answers and the meaning of it all. But I trust Him. I know that God is sovereign. I can not lean on my own understanding. For who has known the mind of God? His ways are unsearchable and past finding out!
One thing I do know, is that I must share the hope that I have in Jesus Christ with others. And I believe that my mission is the same as it was when Shane and Ellie and Caleb were alive. That is to impact the lives of people with the saving message of Jesus Christ. To comfort others who have also experienced loss or grief. To share about God’s presence and protection in the midst of difficult circumstances. To tell you that God loves you and He wants to spend eternity with you. II Corinthians 4:17 says, “For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.” My story does not end here. God continues to write a new page each day, and a glimpse of what He is writing in those chapters is chronicled on this site. For more on my ongoing life adventures, click on the My Continuing Journey page.